While divorce rates in Australia are actually slowly declining, around a third of marriages still end in divorce. Most relationships that come to an end do so due to one or more of the following common reasons for divorce.
8 Common Reasons For Divorce
Whether it’s a sexual fling or an emotional affair, divorced survey respondents across the globe cite lack of trust arising from a partner’s connection to another person as one of the main reasons their marriage didn’t work out. Anger and resentment are common underlying reasons for cheating, along with differences in sexual appetite and lack of emotional intimacy. Infidelity often begins as a seemingly innocent friendship: it starts as an emotional affair which later becomes a physical affair”.
You don’t have to look far to read/see/hear stories of how a relationship has been turned upside down by a windfall or debt and it’s a scenario many marriage counsellors back up, admitting couples who are undergoing counselling are often there because of financial issues within the relationship.
Everything from different spending habits and financial goals to one spouse making considerably more money than the other, causing a power struggle can strain a marriage to the breaking point.
You may have expected your partner would be your knight in shining armour or the perfect housewife. Chances are, you’ll up disappointed in your partner’s limitations as both a partner, and as a human being. Unrealistic expectations can put a lot of unnecessary strain on a relationship, setting respective parties up for failure.
Lack of quality communication
One of the main reasons for divorce is that couples stop communicating clearly. Perhaps it’s because life becomes too busy, or the kids take all your energy. Whatever the reason that quality communication stops, it quite often means that the relationship is in trouble. And lack of quality communication doesn’t have to mean endless arguments, it could be dishing out the silent treatment or assigning all the blame for the relationship’s problems on each other.
Yelling at your spouse, not talking enough throughout the day, making nasty comments to express yourself are all unhealthy methods of communication that need to be ditched in a marriage. Practicing mindful communication, to change age-old marriage mistakes, can be hard but it’s well worth the effort to improve and save your relationship.
Lack of connection
It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day of work, kids and life without so much as looking at your partner, but a lack of connection with your partner can lead to some pretty dark places. Physical intimacy may be the first victim of a too-busy life, but it can also include emotional intimacy, affection, or even that ‘friendship connection’ where you simply enjoy having a laugh together.
If you are constantly giving your spouse the cold shoulder, then know that over time it can become the ground for divorce. Making your relationship intimate and special is the responsibility of both partners. Practice little acts of kindness, appreciation and enjoy physical intimacy as much as possible to sweeten your relationship.
It’s no secret that people change as they get older, but if you and your partner aren’t on the same journey with a shared vision, there’s every chance you could take different paths as the years wear on. In a study published in the Journal of Family Issues, eight per cent of divorced couples admitted they simply grew apart from their spouse as time went on, making it one of the most common reasons for a split.
You got married too young (or too late)
Research shows couples who got married in their late 20s or early 30s enjoy a much higher rate of making to the finish line than those who married in their teens or in their mid-30s or later. It often comes down to either not knowing who you are or what you want out of life yet, or being too set in your ways.
Physical or emotional abuse
According to one Australian study, a significant portion of divorcees (71%) blame abuse issues for the cause of marital breakdown, with one of the major causes listed as physical or emotional abuse. Abuse is not acceptable in a relationship, and nobody should tolerate abuse. Instead, focus on removing yourself (and any children) from the relationship safely.